Part 4-A Baby Story

I thought it might be a good idea to finish this story up as another one is starting soon!

May 31st 5:00 PM
As I was being moved from my room to head down to the OR for a C-Section, my family was packing up all of our belongings. Literally things were being thrown into bags and grabbed out of drawers. My wonderful husband had unpacked our bags the night before and had everything in its place which really helped me to relax a little. Now everything was being crammed back into the suitcase, jerked from the bathroom counters, and tossed everywhere. I couldn't understand what was going on. Why were they making us take all of our stuff out of the room when I would be right back with my new baby? What I didn't know was that I was being moved from the nice LDRPN rooms into a surgical recovery room, one of the older rooms. Awwh, how nice of our hospital. Anyway, I don't remember the ride to the OR. I remember shaking violently though. It was referred to as the epidural shake by the RNs. I remember them telling my family that it would only take 30 minutes for the c-section to take place and I would be wheeled back to my new room. My family left to go down to the waiting area with all of my bags and accessories.
As I was wheeled into the OR, I remember a man with a deep voice standing at the head of my bed. I never saw his face but I believe he was an anethesiologist because he would "up" my meds if I showed any sort of grimace on my face. They wrapped very warm blankets around my head. The laid both of my arms out straight to my sides. They didn't strap them down though. I had a BP cuff on one and then they covered my arms and shoulders with these warm towels as well. That felt so wonderful and really helped with the epidural shake.
DH finally came in and sat near my head-camera in hand. I don't remember much about them making the incision or anything else because I was still very drugged. The main thing I remember is my doctor saying, "She's out but she's asleep so they are going to go wake her up." Little did I know this was code for, she's dead. I remember thinking right then, "yeah, I haven't felt her move much....." For what seemed like HOURS there was nothing but silence. No one was "working" on me, DH wasn't saying anything, and I couldn't hear the nurses from the end of my bed working on my baby. A nurse that pushed my bed to the OR came and looked directly in my face to get my attention like she had something to say...but she just looked, she never said anything. Then she walked off. Then DH started rubbing my forehead with his hand. I didn't understand what the hell was going on. I was able to turn my head and look into his eyes. They were teary and very sad looking. Now my DH doesn't cry....so it finally hit me....I couldn't hear my baby crying. She wasn't breathing. After what seemed like another hour of my DH rubbing my forehead we heard a tiny little cry. The entire room sighed with relief. Literally. After a few more minutes, a male doctor who I would later learn saved my daughter's life, brought her to me. He said, "Here Mom. Give her her first kiss. She had a little trouble breathing so we are going to take to her to the NICU to monitor her for a little while." At this point she was SCREAMING in my face. She was perfect. DH looked at me a little panicked as they put my baby in the isolette to take her away. I calmly said to him, "go with her." As I was stitched back up and my epidural taken out I was drifting farther and farther into neverland. I remember being wheeled down the hallway back to the old ugly rooms. I saw my family jump up from the waiting area and run to meet me. My Dad grabbed my hand and with his eyes asked me if everything was okay. I simply smiled and said yes. They all piled into the room after I was settled and wanted to know about the baby. I was really drugged at this point and pretty uncomfortable as well. I begin relaying the story as the nurse that moved me into the room told me. That the nurses were unable to revive my baby after she was born. She was solid blue when she came out of my belly. They had to call a code blue on my precious little baby. The neonatologist didn't even have time to get on scrubs-he just rushed in and began chest compressions and thank the GOOD LORD he saved her life. Everyone was crying by then, especially my sweet sister who was so worried. The nurse came in then and mentioned that it was visiting hours in the NICU and that the grandparents were allowed in. They all rushed out to get a glimpse of my sweet baby and to take some pictures and video for me. My sister and I sat there and cried together. The next thing I remember is everyone coming back into the room and my DH was finishing off some Micky D's french fries to which I was very jealous of...I was starving! He brought me tons of pictures of my baby who was screaming and slowly turning pink all over. Her hands and feet were still really blue in the first few pics but that changed quickly. She was so beautiful with that bottom lip stuck out.
More to come and I might even upload some of the first pictures.......